Disappointed with Results

So for the past few years, I have weighed around 160 pounds, and for the past year or so, I have weighed anywhere from 165-169 pounds, depending on the day.

My weight seems to fluctuate an entire 4 or 5 pounds sometimes, which I thought was a lot, but apparently this is normal for my body.

For about the last year and a half, my husband Eric & I have been eating the healthiest we've ever eaten, adding whole grains, lean chicken, skim dairy products (for me only; Eric is fatally allergic to dairy), and vegetables and fruits.

Ever since then, I also have been lifting weights a few times a week and running off & on, with a few breaks for vacations & injuries.

Recently, however, I've been stepping up my cutting calories & workout efforts, in an effort to see more muscle definition and lose more fat. I made this decision because I have hardly seen any difference in my body and have not lost any weight, and it's been over a year! That's plenty of time to completely change my body composition! And yet practically nothing has changed for me.

So for the past week, I have been cutting calories, eating even better than usual, and cutting out fancy, sugary coffee drinks all last week, hoping to lose at least 1 pound. I was hoping to lose about 1 or 2 pounds for that effort, and to continue to lose about 1 pound a week. (Experts say that a weight loss of 1-2 pounds per week is the healthiest way to lose weight & keep it off long-term).

I weighed myself today, however, and the scale said 171 pounds! Seriously?!?
I actually gained weight. Now, you're supposed to weigh yourself first thing in the morning with no clothes on, and this was right after lunch, and I was fully clothed. So hopefully that was the reason.

But still! My clothes don't weigh that much!

As you can imagine, I was pretty disappointed & frustrated to find that I had gained weight. All I can hope is that I have gained muscle mass, which weighs more than fat.

I've also read that you should eat "according to your target weight", meaning that, for example, if I want to eventually weigh 150 pounds, I need to eat no more than 1,500 calories a day.

I have found that trying to eat 1,500 or less calories a day is nearly impossible for me. I have only been able to do that a couple of days in the past year, and I was eating so sparingly that I was hungry throughout the day and my stomach was growling so intensely at night that I had difficulty falling asleep.

So I am currently sort of disappointed with my weight-loss journey, but I'm going to keep running hard, lifting weights, and cutting more calories than usual, trying to kick-start some weight loss. Hopefully, once my body is kick-started to lose weight, it will be a bit easier to keep it going.

We shall see!